Thursday, October 9, 2008
Your Face Beat Up My Hand......
In the world today almost half of the female population has either been a victim of or witness to domestic violence. Recent studies including one spoken of on the Steve Harvey Morning Show, suggest that this behavior may have been learned. Meaning "my mom got beat so maybe this is the way to go" others suggest that it is a behavior promoted by fear. The law as it stands now states that if the person who is directly involved with the attacks doesn't come forward, the authorities have no rights to act on it, even if family has expressed a concern. What measures would you take if it was a family member of yours?
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29 comments:
I would love to say its wrong for the law NOT to get involved but what can you do if you have advised your family member and she still gets back with teh guy.
Its like if you take sides in a relationship issue, if they get back together (which 9 times outta 10 they do) then you are looked at as the outsider who needs to mind their own business. If the beatee refuses to let go of the beater then there is really nothing that anyone else can do, but take out a VERY LARGE insurance policy and pray!!
Domestic abuse is an illness for both the abuser and abused. I was in an abusive relationship before and I didn't stay because I thought he loved me, I stayed because I was scared as hell to leave.
He would compensate for my bruises by buying me nice things and eventually it became the norm. My friends wanted to call the police but I told them that he would kill them if they did. Lord knows I wasn't going to press charges out of fear.
This took place 10 years ago. The laws are stricter now. What people and the police don;t understand is once these poeple are out of jail (after 24 hours) they are going to come and beat the shit out of you for sending them to jail. The police don't offer much protection. Do you think a psycho gives a damn about a restraining order. They can ring your door bell and kill you while you're waiting on L-A-T-E 911.
very true the law here in MIlwillie is that once you get called up on a DV charge you have to stay within a certain amount of feet until your court date. If you do not, the police can be called and you're going to jail until your court date, which is sometimes 3 or 4 weeks in the future.
I have a friend who was arrested on that and the wife came to where he was, he had stepped OUT of the house to speak to her she could have called the police to send him right back to jail. But as long as he stayed INSIDE the environs, her call was null and void because she came to him. Weird huh?
There was a lady on Oprah who had a restraining order out on her husband. he came to her job three an excellerant on her and struck a match and walked out. She never had time to make a phone call. She's alive and disfigured now. These virtual police lines don't stop anybody on a mission from coming to harm you.
"you betta bash Mr's head open and think about Heaven later!!"
You betta listen to Sophia....
you see what happened to Sopia Miranda, she ended up cleaning house for Ms Millie...
well Harpo didn't beat that ass no more...
I refuse to live in that kind of fear again. I have a gun now and the next man who puts his hands on me will die. I will not live like that ever again.
I agree A1, it's almost as if the law really doesn't protect the abused until it's too late. Then they want to send out a search warrant. So while they are on the abuser turned killer, the family is preparing for the abused funeral. A friend of mine was in a very abusive relationship and tried not 1, not 2 but 3 times to get a restraining order which she never got. I remember going to court with her for the 3rd time because she was afraid of facing her abuser again. The judge ordered another court hearing because his attorney didn't show up! She just broke down in court and cried. So while she was waiting on another court date this guy could still go anywhere near her because the restraining order was not in place.
that is only because she did the smart thing and LEFT!!!
You all remember the story.....
"Harpo beat on Sophia and Sophia beat on Harpo, and in between the beatings the chillun kept comin...." all until Sophia get up on that raggedy trailer and left!!
Even then it might not work, look at Julia Roberts in Sleeping with the Enemy, she thought she was LONG gone, until she came home and her can goods were arranged. But in the end I guess you right Miranda because she shot his ass!!
My 120lbs hitting a 6'2" swole hood figga really didn't affect him. That only pissed him off more. Imagine you fighting the incredible hulk. No weapons will prosper. It sounds good to say, pick up something and do this. It's really not that easy.
Exactly, that's why I have a gun now. I like muscular men. **wink-wink** so I am going to literally have to put their big ass down. I'm 140 lbs now but that's not enough force to knock Cadillac Tracy who (comes home this month) out.
LMAO @ Cadillac Tracy..
You know there is this lady I forget her name but she was on the Steve Harvey Morning Show, this week Tuesday I believe, telling of how she is writing a proposal called "Saving Promise" It basically was named after her Grandaughter from her daughters current boyfriend. The granddaughter's name is Promise (I know right) but anyway, apparently her mom, her and the daughter have gone through having abusive relationships. She is lobbying to get a law passed that will allow family intervention in these cases.
She said that there are "either two ways you can go when your mom has been abused, you can either go right and say my mom went through this so maybe this is just how its supposed to be, or you can go left and say this shit will never happen to me."
She also said that fear grips the person in the situation sometimes to the point where it paralyzes them from taking action but if they maybe knew that the family supported them and there were ways to get help besides you yourself going in asking for it (Saving Promise and Family Intervention Act) then maybe more and more females would come forward.
The only thing that bothers me is, I have a younger sister, and I wish someone would put their hands on her, but if I beat his ass for touching her, and she gets back with him, then what do I do then? I don't want to cause discord in her home because of my intervention, but I for damn sure aint about to sit here and be Nettie watchin "Mr" Beat on Celie!!
My siblings were all very young and I don;t have uncles that aren;t over 60. Therefore me and my family unit couldn't rise up. Like I said though, it's unlikely thatthe victim will press charges. Your best bet is to stay out of it.
boo I won't be able to do that when my sisters face resembles the fact that she has "35 cents and a mobile card" (Tina Turner)
Staying out of it is not an option for my family, just like you said earlier, "it sounds good to say, but really is not that easy...." fortunately for me, my sister is jsut as ride or die as I am, so if that situation happened, she'd be calling us to handle it ALONG with her, not for her...
But not every family unit is that way, so my prayers are sent out to those who don't or can't rise up for family...
AINT NO BODY FINNA STAY OUT OF IT WHEN A FEMALE IN THEIR FAMILY IS GETTING POUNDED!!!
I wish I would be getting my ass whomped and I got male family members telling me they gon stay out of it...
if it were the other way around and a broad was giving them the blues, me and my girls in that car and at that broad... directly!! Now we aint gonna keep saving yo ass, so when you call me you had better be packed and ready to go, cus I'll be "packin" and ready to go!!
Is that Thelma (BP08) and Louise (Miranda)...LOL!
Hell no sister Mary Clarence, I refuse to be sleep ass Geena Davis or tired ass Susan Sarandon!!! LMAO!!
But you just feel satisfied in the knowledge that had I been your sister you situation that you went through 10 years ago would have been short lived!!
I'm Miranda Hobbs and I approve bp08's message!!!
Maybe so because my brothers are now 19 and 21 and plugged like it aint nobody business. So yes I can see it being short lived and my Dad is back in town. Anyway, I stay strapped and an active memer of the NRA...bring it.
@ AF1
is that Kiesha from New Jack City?
LMAO!!! I aint mad at cha!!!
but what happens say for instance you opt for leaving it alone, and the abuse spills over onto the children if any are involved, when do you say when?
Rock a bye Baby!!!!!
lol
you say when at the point of the first physical altercation, unless the person is a maniac, you are not sparked to hit your mate upon the first disagreement. Chances are it wasn't working anyway!! So leave while you still have a life to live.
that is an interesting philosphy I never would have looked at it that way ANON.. Good show!!!
I wish a mofo would put they hands on me "I'll kill him dead" I had one abusive boyfriend and one day he hit me and when I say I tow the door off the fuse box and beat dat nucca to a pulp I never had any probs after his azz after that or any other nucca. I playz crazy through the dow! And they already know it's gonna be consequences and repercussions if you put yo hands on me and that's real talk!
see bash Mr's head open and think about Heaven Later... GO HEAD BURNING BED!!
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